Tag Archives: recovery

What a difference???

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I have not written a post since May 2, 2019. There have been may things that have happened since that last post. but more on that later. The best thing that has happened is that I was hired as the Lead Sales Associate Part-Time for the Dollar General and started working on 6/3/19. Even better than that the full time Lead Sales Associate just up and turned in their keys and walked out on 7/4/19 – which in turn allowed me to be promoted to Lead Sales Associate Full Time also giving me the ability to have full benefits.

Yes, the recovery journey continues with hiccups but they are coming fewer and further between each other.

It has been interesting adjusting to a schedule that is not set in stone, I am glad that I am sitting behind a desk – but the standing and constant walking is taking a daily toll on the hips causing me to be extremely tired – but that is a good thing. I love the fact that I am interacting with people daily and many of them are regulars that we see everyday.

I also attended the wedding of my youngest niece on 6/23/19 and that was a wonderful event. I will writ more on that later with pictures.

That’s what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!!

 

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“R” is for Recovery, Revival & Remembering

#AtoZChallenge 2019 Tenth Anniversary blogging from A to Z challenge letter R

#AtoZChallenge

So today I am playing catch up on my #AtoZChallenge because I have been a little under the weather and recovering after having my remaining 9 teeth removed last Wednesday 4/17/19 to make room for a whole mouth of new pearly white dentures. I was in a bit of pain and extremely tired since I have been unable to eat any substantially filling food for over a week. Today I will be posting for R, S, T, U, V, W and X and I will be caught up.

Recovery for me is such an important topic. Currently I am recovering from dental surgery and I can feel my mouth healing and I am so glad for that. This means we will be on our way to getting my dentures in a quicker fashion that we thought. So I am extremely happy for the work that my dentist did.

The other part of RECOVERY for me as is known through my writings is from alcoholism and addiction to cocaine. You see, recovery is never a one and done. Anyone who tells you that is is delusional. I do suffer from chronic relapse disease with returns to recovery. Today I share with two songs about recovery from addiction.  You Found Me  by The Fray and I Surrender  by  Hillsong United.

 

When I think of  REVIVAL, there is nothing greater to me than going to Mass and receiving Communion and being reminded that this Sacrament is exactly that a revival for my body and soul for that 24 hour period!! For your enjoyment Revival by Zach Williams!!

We all can use a bit of remembering that we are special  no matter what is going on in our lives. We also need to remember that we are loved and we must always love ourselves and make sure that if we are in need of assistance with any type of addiction or mental health issue that it can be found if we want it. We must remember that we will not change if we do not truly want to change!!! I give you Remember by Lauren Daigle!!

That’s what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!

 

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#AtoZChallenge & #1LinerWeds – 4/17/19

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#AtoZChallenge & #1LinerWeds 4/17/19

I am so excited that today my journey begins to a mouth full of new pearly whites by having my remaining teeth removed, but enough about me!!

“O” is for OVERCOMER!!! Thriving, not just surviving with HIV/AIDS for over 22 years, being bipolar and dealing with off and on bouts of depression and of course my issues with chronic relapses and return to recovery – I know that YES I AM AN OVERCOMER!!!!

 

That’s what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!!

A to Z 2019

#FOWC – Symptom

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“Though our decision (to stop our drinking with this program of recovery – my words) was a vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us. Our liquor was but a symptom. So we had to get down to causes and conditions. Therefore, we started upon a personal inventory. This was Step Four.”

I say all the time that I can do Steps 1, 2 and 3 every day all day, however Step Four has always been the hardest for me and now I am about to embark on it again because, I know that since 2016 when I turned 50 and removed 2 1/2 years of sobriety and began the vicious cycle of chronic relapses and forays into recovery, that I have a lot to inventory and take accountability for. It will be hard and I am sure I will sad, angry and even hurt by what has to put down on paper, but I also know that when it is done – I will be further along in my journey to sustained recovery.

Big Book Personal Stories Part III – Freedom from Bondage p. 544

I relate so much to the first two paragraphs of this personal story from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous linked above. I guarantee you that if in my teens or early twenties I had been diagnosed as bipolar with tendencies to have bouts of depression, I don’t know that I would have been as prone to have the issues with alcoholism and addiction to cocaine that I have struggled with so much intermittently in my 30’s, 40’s and now early in my 50’s. Then again, Maybe I would have. As I always say, I am forever a work in progress!!!

That’s what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!

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#FOWC

 

#FOWC – Radar

ra·dar: /ˈrāˌdär/ – noun

  1. A system for detecting the presence, direction, distance, and speed of aircraft, ships, and other objects, by sending out pulses of high-frequency electromagnetic waves that are reflected off the object back to the source.

  2. An apparatus used for radar. Plural noun: radars

  3. Used to indicate that someone or something has or has not come to the attention of a person or group.

Related imageAs a person who not only suffers from being bipolar with depression but also has struggled through chronic relapses and forays into recovery, I always believed that my drinking or using was going on under the RADAR unless of course I was truly drunk or otherwise. Only a true sick person would not see that their behaviors when using never change and they always on their loved ones radar.

On Saturday 3/16/2019 I picked up a new 60 day chip, my 60 days was actually on 3/9 but I wanted to get my chip during our monthly BBQ at my home group The Goliad Group. It is so great to have people in your life that never judge you no matter how many times you fall and get back up!!!

That’s what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!!

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#FOWC

#FOWC – Blot

Related imageSome days I feel just like this ink-blot painting full of a variety of colors, excitement and happiness!!!

Related imageOther days, I feel as though the phantom BLOT has taken over me when my manic episodes are in play and the depression is trying to creep in – in turn trying to trigger some use of alcohol or other substance.

My goal daily is to keep the phantom blot at bay by sticking to my routines that work, and I have found that this is the most important key of my day!!!

That’s what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!!

#FOWC – Beware

Be·ware: /bəˈwer/
verb

Of course we have to have a little bit of heaven in this post too!! We sure do love our four-legged babies!! We have always been blessed with absolutely gorgeous pups!!

 

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Crissy, Stitchy, Sadie, Zailey and Little Bitty!!!
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Zailey, Sadie and Stitchy